Norbert the angry duck

We now have a duck. This is why I have become a blogger… random things happen in my everyday life. Things that probably don’t happen to other twenty-something girls…

For instance… Norbert.

My husband, Burn TACtics, has just recently started his job at South Lake Tahoe fire department… pretty much a dream job for him (and for me for that matter). We love the outdoors and all that comes with that, as well as the snow!! And my family has a cabin in South Lake so I have been going up there for years. Needless to say, we are very excited.

However,

Imagine moving in the snow… right? It truly makes the pain of moving that much more of a pain. Especially when you consider the fact that Burny is coming off of unemployment and we have pretty much burned through our nest egg. And now, very quickly, we have to come up with a deposit, pet deposit, first months rent, uhaul etc etc etc. The list goes on.

So in the meantime, Burny and I- well mostly me- have been staying with my mom at her house. Burny drives up the hill to work and when I can or have to, I go with him.

This was one such weekend. I had to work up there Friday morning, so we headed up Thursday night… in the middle of this HUGE storm system that has been pounding all of California.

It has to be said that this was the worst storm either of us had ever driven in. Sorry to scare ya mom, but really, it was gnarly. We were slipping in our four wheel drive and I was on the verge of an anxiety attack. So we pulled off just below Strawberry, if you know where that is, to catch our breath and get some water.

We never ever stop on the drive to Tahoe… it’s just not long enough.

But that night, we did.

And who was waiting for us? Norbert.

Just as Burny steps out of the car, here comes a little baby duck fluttering up to his feet. He was clearly lost. I mean come on, birds fly south. So Thomas went to pick him up and he flew away and we thought that was that.

But oh no.

Mr. ‘owner of the 76 station who doesn’t speak English’ was very insistent that the story would not end there. He yelled and pointed and all around freaked out at the thought of the duck being in his parking lot.

“No live here. Duck no snow,” was about all we could get out of the guy. So we nodded and agreed and smiled, like you do when someone is talking to you in a language I guess they assume you know. But no, he wanted more than just understanding. The man puts a net in Burny’s hands and pushes him out the door back into the storm. He is pointing like a crazy man at the duck’s tracks (keep in mind the duck is now no where to be seen) and despite the language barrier, there was no mistaking what he was getting at.

So Burny and I have no choice but to hunt the little guy down.

And sure enough, Burny’s tracking skills lead us straight to the lost duck.

Mr. store owner is very excited. Clearly we have figured out his riddle! And now he rushes us back into the store and we are thinking, oh god, they are gonna eat this little duck. But NO!

“To the lake!” The man says in his broken, enthusiastic English, and puts the baby duck in a box and points to us. He wants us to take the duck to the lake, an hour away. But I mean, what else can we do? The man is not asking us a question… he is stating a fact.

So we take the baby duck, whom I so lovingly deem Norbert  (or Lily… but Norbert until proven otherwise), and bring him along on the slippery ride up the hill to the lake.

Of course it’s late when we finally get up there, and we don’t want to go to the lake, and we are tired and basically now we have a pet duck. A pet duck, whom I loved until he showed his true colors.

Duck is pissed.

Duck does not see that we have saved his life.

Duck does not understand the situation.

Duck does not realize the alternative!!

So now we have an angry duck who may or may not be able to stand, who is now dyed green from his own fecal matter and who literally strikes at you like a snake when you try to love him.

I mean really??

So tell me… what do ducks eat? We’ve tried dog food, rice, and sour cream and onion chips… We tried to give him a bath but he was too pissed that we were alive to even enjoy it… and where do I take him if he is in fact hurt?

And most importantly… do you want a duck???